Let’s talk about libidos—a topic often misunderstood, occasionally whispered about, and deeply intriguing. When it comes to desire, the stereotype paints men as always "ready to go" and women as needing "the right mood," but the reality is far more complex—especially for women.
In this article, we’ll dive into what makes female libido unique, exploring the biology, psychology, and lifestyle factors that influence it. Most importantly, we’ll share science-backed strategies to better understand and nurture women’s sexual desire. Buckle up—this isn’t just about breaking myths; it’s about empowering women with knowledge and solutions tailored to them.
The Biological Basics
First things first, biology plays a big role. Testosterone is a key player in sexual desire for both men and women. Men typically have higher levels of testosterone, which helps explain their generally more consistent libido.
Women’s hormones work like a dynamic symphony, constantly shifting through stages like the menstrual cycle, pregnancy, postpartum, and menopause. These hormonal changes, particularly in estrogen, progesterone, and testosterone levels, can directly influence sexual desire by affecting energy levels, mood, physical touch and arousal, and even how connected women may feel with their partners.
For example, libido may peak during ovulation when estrogen and testosterone levels are higher, and it can decrease during phases of hormonal imbalance, such as postpartum or menopause.
For men, while testosterone dominates, other factors like stress and lifestyle can also impact libido. It’s not as simple as testosterone alone.
The Mental and Emotional Side
Desire isn’t always as straightforward as the stereotypes suggest.
For women, libido tends to be more linked to mental well-being. Feeling stressed, disconnected, or just plain tired can have a much bigger impact on their desire. Emotional intimacy, mental health, and feeling secure in a relationship often intertwine with physical desire for women.
According to Dr. Emily Nagoski, a leading expert in sexual health, and the author of ‘Come as you are’, (a groundbreaking book that explores the science behind female sexuality), stress can act like a “brake” on a woman’s sexual response. Negative emotions and anxiety can disrupt the body’s natural arousal system, making it harder to feel desire or enjoy sexual satisfaction.
How Lifestyle Plays a Role
Lifestyle can have a big impact on both men’s and women’s libido.
Poor sleep, high stress, unhealthy eating, and lack of exercise can diminish desire regardless of gender. However, research suggests that women’s libido might be more sensitive to these factors. For example, chronic stress or sleep deprivation can derail their interest in intimacy more dramatically than men’s.
On the bright side, a healthy lifestyle—think balanced nutrition, regular physical activity, and prioritising self-care—can boost libido. For both genders, taking care of your mental and physical health pays off in more ways than one.
The Myth of "Higher vs. Lower" Libido
Did you know there’s no such thing as a “normal” libido? It varies significantly from person to person and even from day to day! Libido is just another way to speak of a person’s sex drive. There is no numeric measurement for libido; we simply refer to someone as having a high or low libido.
One of the biggest misconceptions is that men always have a "higher" libido than women. It’s personal, and it can vary widely even within the same gender. Plenty of women have strong, consistent sexual drives, and many men experience fluctuations.
Libido can also change over time. Relationship dynamics, health conditions, and even age can influence desire. And let’s not forget—communication is key. Being open about your needs and feelings can bridge any libido gaps and strengthen intimacy.
Libido and the Female/Male Brain
Libido works differently for women and men, shaped by distinct yet complementary systems in the brain.
For women, desire is a complex interplay of interconnected systems. It’s not confined to specific brain regions but is influenced by emotional well-being, relationship satisfaction, hormonal changes, and external stressors. Moments of connection, relaxation, or confidence can ignite desire, while stress, feeling disconnected from her partner, or even a lack of sleep can dampen it.
This complexity helps explain why women’s sex drive can feel more sensitive and multifaceted than men’s. That said, when all the elements above align, this sensitivity is a strength, making a woman’s sexual experience profoundly fulfilling.
For men, their libido largely resides in two key areas of the brain: the cerebral cortex and the limbic system. These parts of the brain are critical to a man’s libido and performance. They are so important, in fact, that a man can have an orgasm simply by thinking or dreaming about a sexual experience.
In Dr. Emily Nagoski book, ‘Come as you are’, she expands on these concepts for both women and men, describing sexual arousal as influenced by two key systems in the brain, which she labels as ‘sexual accelerators’ and ‘sexual brakes’.
- The Sexual "Accelerator" (Excitatory System): This system responds to things that turn you on, such as physical sensations, emotional connections, or fantasies.
- The Sexual "Brake" (Inhibitory System): This system responds to things that turn you off, like stress, anxiety, or negative body image.
Understanding what sets us off or causes us to ‘brake’ can change the dynamic in the bedroom. Finding ways of coping with stress is also another strong tactic. Supplements with mood-stabilising effects offer a great solution. One of our top recommendations is Novomins Turn-Me-On Gummies.
The key ingredient, damiana, is believed to have both aphrodisiac and anxiolytic (anti-anxiety) effects. This powerful herb is making waves in the wellness world for its potential to boost sexual performance—thanks to its effects on blood flow, hormone balance, and overall vitality.
In addition to Damiana, the formulation contains vitamins B6 and B12, which support the nervous system, psychological function and help combat tiredness and fatigue, as well as L-arginine (an amino acid that acts as a vasodilator by improving blood flow) key in stimulating physical arousal.
It doesn't stop there; adaptogens such as Ashwagandha, Tribulus Terrestris, Maca Root, and Fenugreek Extract are included, combining scientific research with traditional Ayurvedic wisdom.
Here’s a breakdown of their adaptogenic properties:
- Ashwagandha has been researched for its ability to reduce stress, enhance energy levels, and support hormonal balance.
- Tribulus Terrestris has been studied for its ability to treat sexual dysfunction and has traditionally been used to support reproductive health.
- Maca Root is associated with improved energy, stamina, and sexual vitality.
- Fenugreek Extract is often studied for its role in supporting hormonal regulation and enhancing libido in both men and women.
Use Empathy as a Way to Connect
Ultimately, understanding the differences between men’s and women’s libidos isn’t about labelling one as better or worse. It’s about appreciating how unique and adaptable our desires can be.
It’s important to focus on habits, lifestyle choices, and nutrition that support both partners mental and physical well-being. The main thing is to approach the topic with curiosity, empathy, and a willingness to connect.
Is There a Quick Fix for Low Libido?
While there's no instant fix, you can support your libido with the right habits, like exercise, a healthy diet, and the right nutritional supplements.
Supplements like Novomins Turn Me on Gummies contain clinically studied ingredients like damiana and maca root that promote sexual drive and desire. See more below.
Libido Support for Her
Novomins Turn Me on Gummies have been featured in Glamour, The Independent, The Observer, Hello, Cosmopolitan, and more!
These gummies contain a powerful botanical blend formulated by nutritionists and expert scientists. Key ingredients include damiana, maca root, ashwagandha, fenugreek, zinc, vitamins B6 and B12, and other traditional botanicals known for supporting both psychological and physiological aspects of low libido.
Libido Support for Him
If your male partner could also use a boost in the bedroom, Novomins has just the formula! Novomins Testo-Boost Gummies contain 11 clinically studied vitamins, minerals, and botanicals with 100% natural ingredients tailored to meet men’s unique health needs.
Takeaway
Sexual well-being isn’t about striving for perfection or fitting into a mould; it’s about understanding you and your partner's unique needs, accepting yourself, and creating the right environment—both emotionally and physically—for desire and pleasure to thrive.
Frequently asked questions
What are signs of low libido?
Someone with a low libido may have little to no interest in sex or masturbation. They can even begin to worry or feel dissatisfied about their current level of sexual disinterest.
What causes low libido?
A lot of things can contribute to a low libido, like relationship issues, stress, anxiety, exhaustion, hormonal changes, medication or birth control side effects, and even drug or alcohol use.
Is There a Bigger Problem?
If low libido is affecting your relationships or daily life, it’s a good idea to talk to a doctor. They can help identify any underlying problems and offer tailored advice to improve things.
Need More Health Tips & Recommendations? Novomins Health Blog has the Answers!
Novomins Health Blog gives you top tips from our expert nutritionists.
- Click here: Maca & Sex Drive: How This Superfood Enhances Libido.
- Lack of sleep can also affect your sex life. Click here: Tired After 8 Hours Sleep? Here’s What To Do
- Get all the answers! Click here to access our complete collection of health articles.